


Eternal Rivals 2: Electric Boogaloo

by yunyu



Category: Naruto
Genre: Challenges, Friendship, Gen, Humor, Rivalry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-25
Updated: 2018-01-21
Packaged: 2018-10-10 08:18:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10433433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yunyu/pseuds/yunyu
Summary: Sakura wanted Lee to stop asking her out, so she had the bright idea to suggest that they become Eternal Rivals instead.Kakashi: ...r u sure. R U SURE?(a randomly updated, non-narrative collection of Glorious Challenges between The Beautiful Green Beast and the Cherry Blossom Slugger)





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [mouseymightymarvellous](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mouseymightymarvellous/gifts).



> This fic is dedicated to the enabling of mouse, quoth: "Because if Nards and Sauce get to have their epitragibromance, then Sakura should get to have an awesome, intense friendly rivalry full of insanity and challenges whose events will never be repeated."

“Did you steal this wheelchair from the hospital?” demands Sakura.

Kakashi doesn’t look up from his book. “Maa, as Hokage, I suppose you’d have to say I  _expropriated_ the wheelchair from the hospital.”

“Hokage-sama! I have brought the eggs!” Lee holds out an egg to Kakashi.

“Lee, Lee, Lee,” says Guy reprovingly. “In a duel, if one party provides the weapons, the other party must choose from between them! To do otherwise could call the entire integrity of the challenge into question.”

“Of course! How could I be so foolish.” Lee darts over to where Guy is and takes the other egg back from him. “Hokage-sama! Please forgive me and select from among these eggs!”

Kakashi switches to a one-handed grip on his book and gestures with a spoon to the left egg.

“Ohohoho.” Guy accepts the other egg and settles it into a spoon with a keen eye. “Kakashi! Such a bright spring day! Perfect weather for seeing two youth take on their first challenge as Eternal Rivals!”

Kakashi turns a page as Sakura hoists him, the egg and spoon, and the wheelchair above her head without any difficulty. “Alright. So it’s whoever can do the most laps around Konoha without the egg breaking. Any other rules?”

“I trust in your Honour and Pride as a Konoha ninja, Sakura-san!”

“You better not still be reading that smut up there,” Sakura says as she takes her place at the starting line.

Kakashi murmurs, “So disrespectful,” and she hears another page turn.

They take off on the count of three. The first ninety-eight laps go relatively well,  although around lap 36 Kakashi and Sakura almost lost the egg taking a hard turn to avoid some bewildered genin, and from lap 67 to lap 78 Kakashi read aloud from  _Icha Icha Violence_  in protest of Sakura’s ill-timed assertion that Kakashi was faking reading the book.

Sakura doesn’t remember anything, however, between lap ninety-eight and waking up in the hospital with Tsunade’s scowling face peering down at her.

“You couldn’t have made it two more laps, Sakura?” she demands.

“You bet that I would win?!” croaks Sakura. “You screwed me, shishou!”

“ _You_ screwed _me_! Do you know how much ryo I had riding on you making it to a hundred laps?”


	2. Chapter 2

“My beautiful rival! Happy birthday!”

Sakura sighed and forced a smile. Dammit, she had been hoping to go home after a long shift and invite the girls over for chocolate cake and sappy movies. “Hello Lee. Thank you.”

“You are now in full bloom at last as an adult! A momentous day for you!”

Sakura blinked. “Lee, legally I’ve been an adult since we became genin.”

“How right you are, Sakura-san!”

“And I first killed a man when I was sixteen.”

“And a breathtaking display it was, I’m sure!”

“And I also punched a goddess in the back of the head.”

Lee pressed his hands together rapturously. “Yes! That is my rival alright! That legendary right hook!”

“And I’ve run the hospital for two years now, not to mention that I’ve founded a mental health program? So what is such a big deal about turning twenty?”

Without noticing it, she had fallen into step with Lee, and he clasped a green spandex covered arm around her shoulders. “Oh Sakura-san! Only that I must treat you to your first drink, of course!”

“…my first drink?”

Inexorably they turned into an izakaya, Sakura looking with trepidation at the many, many, many breakable objects. “Quite! And it being your birthday, my lovely rival, it behooves me to pay for as many shots as you can stomach!” He chuckled. “Of course, I can’t imagine it will be that many, so you need not worry about my wallet.”

Sakura’s eyes sparkled. “Alright. But would you excuse me a minute? I need to use the ladies’ room.”

———

“Shots, shots, shots, shots! Woooooo!” shouted Kiba.

“I’m—I’m not paying for him,” hiccuped Lee. “If he drinks—not on my tab, you got that?”

“I think you are addressing the wrong person,” Shino said as he sipped his mead. “Why? Because I do not control the billing of this establishment.”

“Another bottle!” laughed Sakura. “The good stuff!”

At a nearby table, Guy frowned. “I am not sure if I approve of this kind of challenge. Encouraging a young lady to intoxicate herself is decidedly unhip.”

“We did it once,” said Kakashi, sipping his whiskey.

“We did? What happened? I don’t remember that.”

Kakashi chuckled. “I’m not surprised. We were both banned from any establishment serving liquor for two years.”

“Oh, was that why we stopped going to the bar?” Guy tapped his upper lip thoughtfully. “I really can’t remember!”

Across the village, Sakura, Ino, Hinata, Tenten, and Shizune tucked into a deluxe chocolate cake with enthusiasm.

“—so I called shishou from the bathroom and said if she could adjust her appearance jutsu to look like me, I could get her all-you-can-drink!”


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Inspired by [this art](https://fineillsignup.tumblr.com/post/169965075673/rale-art-strong-students-carrying-their-sensei) by rale-art on Tumblr.
> 
> Also knekkebrod also drew [some fanart for this series](https://fineillsignup.tumblr.com/post/159264054243/corgi-ears-fineillsignup-has-a-fanfic-where) on her art account corgi-ears. So... so youthful!!!! *happy tears and thumbs up* Thank you!!!!

“Hokage-sama, the representative from Kumogakure is at the gates with—um…”

“Yes, Donkey-san, what is it?”

“Are… are you busy?”

Kakashi turned a page as his hair came precariously close to hitting the ceiling fan while Sakura hefted him up. “Don’t you recognize a challenge when you see one?”

“Uh… how… how long will this take?” The bewildered ANBU asked.

“Yosh!” said Lee nearby, squatting down with Might Guy. “I am on rep 4670!”

Guy gave a thumbs up as he was lifted back up. “Yes! Keep it going Lee! Banzai!”

“Banzai!!!” said Lee, tears forming in his eyes as he lifted Guy above his head again.

“So… so how many…?”

“First to ten thousand!” Guy turned his toothy grin towards the ANBU and gave a double thumbs up–a deadly combo. “To celebrate our dear Hokage’s longevity! Banzai!”

“Banzai!” said Lee again, the tears now flowing in earnest. “So youthful..!”

“You’d better control your tears, Lee-kun,” Kakashi said, pulling the book closer to his face to hide his blush. “Sakura-chan is already on 4823.”

“Less talking, more rocking!” Sakura grunted as she dipped down.

“Sakura-san is the most youthful!!!! Banzai! Banzai!” sobbed Rock Lee as he increased his pace.

“Banzai! Such an inspiration to you! Go! Lee! Go! Sakura!” Guy clung to his dearest student as he sobbed, somewhat hampering his athletic efforts, but Lee kept up the quicker pace regardless.

The ANBU fled the room, preferring to deal with an angry foreign diplomat rather than… whatever that was.


End file.
